Crystal Hefner will give the readers of her upcoming memoir "Only Say Good Things: Surviving Playboy and Finding Myself" insights into her relationship with the Playboy founder and her time at the Playboy Mansion.

But before that, the former Playboy Playmate did an interview with People, where she acknowledged that though she loved Hugh, she was never "in love" with him and simply served as his caregiver in his final years.

Their almost five-year relationship as a married couple came with a price, she told the entertainment news outlet.

"I realized I was dealing with a really big power imbalance. It seemed like a world of success and fantasy, but everyone's having to sleep with an 80-year-old. There's a price. Everything has a price," she explained.

Crystal stayed with the international sex icon until he died from sepsis and cardiac arrest in September 2017 at age 91.

Crystal Hefner
(Photo : Charley Gallay/Getty Images)

The former model first met Hugh at a 2008 Halloween party. She was just 21 years old at the time, while Hugh was 81. Four years later, they tied the knot on New Year's Eve.

During their first meeting, she and Hefner, who was 60 years her senior, bonded over their interest in Psychology, per People. Shortly after, she was asked to move in with him at the Playboy Mansion and made her debut in the magazine a year later.

"I thought, wow, if I just like everything that he likes and do all the things that he wants me to do, then I'm the favorite. And I was, but I just lost myself in the process," Crystal said, reflecting on her experience with the Playboy founder.



Hugh Hefner
(Photo : Charley Gallay/Getty Images for Playboy)

Before her ex-husband died, he asked her to promise him to only say good things about him when he's gone. But Crystal was not able to keep that promise for long.

"I kept that promise for the last five years," she told The Post.

She continued, "After going through a lot of therapy and healing, I realized that I needed to be honest about my time there (the Playboy Mansion). The book is about healing from a toxic environment."

According to Hugh's widow, she had to abide by her former husband's strict rules about everything, including the color of her nail polish, grooming choices, hair color and the like.

"Only Say Good Things: Surviving Playboy and Finding Myself" comes out on Jan. 23.


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