Lindsay Lohan made her first on-screen appearance as the host of Chelsea Lately on Monday night and was excited to talk about other celebrities, rather than herself.
Wearing an all-black outfit, Lohan opened her monologue by making fun of Chelsea Handler.
"Chelsea's not here and I actually don't know where she is, but I did see someone who looks a lot like her moving into my old room at Cliffside," she said, referring to the rehab facility she spent the past 90 days in. "I've been on a lovely court-ordered vacation in Malibu."
After calling her time in rehab "great and wonderful," Lohan went on to thank the celebrities who kept the tabloid industry alive during her absence.
"I want to thank Anthony [Weiner] for being such a d*ck with an unlimited texting plan," she said as a Weiner impersonator walked on stage. "Kanye, I want to thank you for acting like a baby and making a baby. On a side note, how come when Kanye acts like an idiot, he gets a gold record, but when I act like an idiot, I get a police record?"
In addition to Weiner and West, she thanked Justin Bieber for peeing, spitting and wearing his pants in places where he shouldn't, and of course, she thanked the royal baby.
The Canyons star then joined Brad Wollack, Fortune Feimster and Jen Kirkman at the roundtable to discuss more celebrity news.
During the panel's discussion about the bisexual rumors surrounding One Direction's Harry Styles, Lohan noted, "I've been there."
They also discussed Kristen Stewart's paparazzi incident in which Lohan said, "I'm just excited that Kristen Stewart finally showed some emotion."
Afterwards, the 27-year-old actress interviewed Dylan Bruce about the sci-fi TV series, Orphan Black. The actor mentioned that he recently described the show as "The Parent Trap on steroids," referring to one of Lohan's earlier films.
"I'm proud to have hosted the first episode in Chelsea Lately history that did not feature a salacious headline about Lindsay Lohan," she said, during her closing remarks.
After she left rehab last week, it was announced that the redheaded star will undergo an additional 15 months of psychological therapy. She is currently filming a docu-series for OWN and will talk to Oprah Winfrey for her first on-air interview since her rehab stint when Oprah's Next Chapter airs on Aug. 18