How to Seduce Bill Gates: Redditors Share Hilarious and Shocking Ways Amid Melinda Gates Divorce
Since the announcement of Bill Gates and Melinda French Gates' divorce was publicized, many people are trying to shoot their shot at the two billionaires.
On different social media, many people have been posting screenshots of the funny, tacky, smooth, and disturbing things they sent Bill Gates, who has a current net worth of $126 billion.
With both of them single and billionaires, a thread on Reddit is filled with ideas on how they would seduce the co-founders of the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation.
Here are some of them.
Whispering Love To The Vaccine
A couple of Redditors said that one of the surefire ways to seduce billionaire Bill Gates is by talking to their COVID-19 vaccine.
In the past few months, Bill has been urging people to get vaccinated to save not only their lives but also everyone else around them.
However, there has been an inside joke on Reddit that vaccines from the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation are bugged with "chips."
@irrelevantadivor quipped, "As a Microsoft employee, I can tell you that's not how it works," responding to @chaz_wazzers saying that he won't do anything to seduce Bill because "he knows where to find me. I've been vaccinated."
"The chip is designed to place itself inside your butt cheek when inserted through the vaccine. To activate it tho you'll have to gently cup your ass & loudly chant TRACK ME, DADDY."
They added, "Only then the chip will activate enabling Mr. Gates to find you."
The same Redditor advised that the only way to destroy the "chip" is to "use essential oils."
Hide Messages in EULA
Some Redditors think that putting in "Will you marry me" messages among other sneaky messages in End User License Agreements is another way to get Bill Gates to click "agree."
@CaptainApathy419 wrote, "By agreeing to these Terms, you consent to be bound in holy matrimony in accordance with the laws of the state of Washington and all deities major and minor."
Using Extremely Ancient Machines
Reddit user@ithinkoutloudtoo believes that showing Bill Gates his old Dell desktop running Windows XP Professional would be the perfect way for the billionaire to see him.
"It still starts and runs greats," he added.
@thecynicaltrashbag may have the perfect stress-free, hassle-free plan to get Bill Gates to notice them.
Singing Bill Gates A Song
@vicstolemylunchmoney said he will be serenading Bill Gates with an acoustic version of "It's All About the Pentiums" then they will become instantly engaged.
The Ultimate Plan to Seduce Bill Gates
@LordCitrus wrote the lengthiest post on the Reddit thread on how he plans to seduce the billionaire.
He claimed that he would research the things that interest the tech mogul, even writing some NYT bestselling books.
He'll also try to hold several book signings that would overlap with Bill's travel itinerary until they finally meet and exchanged numbers.
The Redditor also mentioned Jeff Bezos in the post, but long story short, the comments of this post were blown away.
@nrcssa wrote, "The very least Bill could do is sponsoring your writing career after this masterpiece."
Using The Best Microsoft Puns
@your-playboy has the second-best poetic response to the thread.
Going After Melinda French Gates
Some Redditors are not going after the fourth richest man in the world but instead will go to his ex-wife, Melinda French Gates.
@jerkollatex wrote, "She's the cute one."
Since the divorce, Melinda French Gates' net worth has been increasing, now she's worth $3 billion.
Did Bill Gates Write That Reddit Post?
According to @GstSalen, Bill Gates started the entire thread on Reddit because he's horny and wants a fan fiction out of him.
"Get out of Reddit, did you think we wouldn't be able to tell?"