Billionaires, celebrities, and fashion royalty converged on a private island in Italy over the weekend to celebrate the wedding of Jeff Bezos and Lauren Sánchez– but the real spectacle happened before the vows were even exchanged.

As stars made their way to the $20 million affair via water taxis, the entrances were less red carpet and more slapstick, according to lip reader Nicola Hickling, who deciphered what guests were actually saying during their less-than-glamorous arrivals to the Daily Mail.

Oprah Takes Charge, Hilfiger Takes A Spill

Oprah Winfrey, dressed in a pastel pink gown and matching glasses, hesitated as she approached her water taxi. "Let me hold onto you. Don't let me fall. Be careful with me," she told a porter, appearing to steady herself. Before boarding, she paused to announce, "Hang on, let me wave, I'm gonna wave," then insisted the staffer climb in first.

Fashion designer Tommy Hilfiger wasn't as lucky. The 74-year-old lost his footing while stepping onto the boat, muttering, "This is so s**t" after asking, "Why do we need to stand here?" A bystander appeared to tease, "You're drunk, and this is why you fall," as Hilfiger laughed off the moment and flashed a peace sign.

Kardashian Chaos At The Docks

Khloé Kardashian, celebrating her birthday, arrived in a dramatic pink gown but looked anxious while boarding. She asked someone nearby, "Is this our taxi?" and moments later admitted, "It's so complicated, oh down we go." Kim Kardashian added, "Here we go, I'm on," as the sisters stepped onto the boat.

Their younger siblings, Kendall and Kylie Jenner, weren't immune to the boat jitters. Kylie, appearing nervous, asked a porter, "Which way?" before handing over her wine glass and saying, "Can you hold this? Thank you." She then turned to Kendall and said, "Let's hold hands and go together," but stumbled slightly as she climbed in, exclaiming, "Uh oh."

Kris Jenner Makes The Rules

While her daughters crossed the docks with varying degrees of panic, Kris Jenner stayed composed. She declined to share a boat with her longtime partner, Corey Gamble, reportedly telling him, "I told you... for God's sake... I'd like to travel alone."

After some back and forth, Gamble relented and stepped off briefly before joining Jenner again. A porter was overheard asking, "You want to travel alone?" to which Corey replied, "It's what Kris would like to do."

Meanwhile, Kim and Khloé were seen chatting on a separate ride to the festivities. According to Hickling, Kim told her sister, "He's a fun guy, that'll make you smile," though it's unclear who she meant.

Even with every luxury accounted for, it seems not even the richest and most famous can escape an awkward entrance.

Tags
Kris jenner, Corey gamble, Kim Kardashian, Khloe Kardashian, Kylie Jenner, Kendall Jenner, Jeff Bezos, Lauren sanchez